Yesterday Just Plain Sucked

There isn't a whole lot going on right now...

Got some Wii Fit done. My Wii Fit age seems to be staying around 25. I'd like to get it back down to 20. But considering I'm 29, I'm quite pleased with that number.

I'm still remaining hopeful that something will come up. I'm just not thinking it's going to happen. I get these feelings like it is only to be horribly let down.

I'm thinking that my roommate is passive-aggressively letting me know that she's probably going to move out. In a lot of ways, that's perfectly fine. I honestly don't think she places any value on me as a friend. At least that's how it comes across. Maybe it's because I'm the person who actually talks about and deals with problems. She never actually discussed lowering her rent with my SO, she just did it. So, being communicative, not exactly a strong suit.

Yesterday I totally broke down. I'd like to think that I'm a stronger person. I also like to think that I'm a nice person and one who has a good soul. For some reason I just didn't feel it last night. I just started crying for a while. I felt like crepe. And to a certain degree I still do. I think we've figured out a good portion of the problem though, I spend too much time around negative people. I think my SO and myself have come to the conclusion that I need a vacation from the apartment.

I think my problem is that I have a hard time being around people who essentially create their own problems. My roommate is one of those people. She doesn't talk about the problems she's having, trying to get some form of resolve from it. Which is why a lot of her relationships end badly. She's dating someone who smokes and doesn't maintain her ideal of good hygiene. Which, according to her are two deal breakers... so, I think you get a good idea where I'm at.

I hear her complain about him a lot. Or, when he's over, she complains about where he lives. Which means that she has him over a lot. I don't mind having him over, but when they're together I get this crushing negative feeling. One where I just simply do not want to be home anymore. I know I can't deal with this anymore.

Luckily enough, we need to re-negotiate rent at the end of this month. We're going to bump her rent to 40% from the 28% she's been paying (the original amount we agreed upon was 33% which I think she's paid like twice).

*sigh* I know, this sounds all fairly vitriolic. And to a certain degree, I feel that way. I think that the friendship is better off with us just not living together. I like here when I don't have to deal with living together. I'm certain that this happens to a lot of people. You never know someone until you live with them.